Detail: 30-07-2022 - Barbarians

Result: W by 4 wkts
Match report: Blues vs Barbars 2022

The big day had finally arrived, HT's send off, the last Blues Barbars game. With gun bat Alex Pike taking a summer straight from the Fitz playbook, he was of course abroad somewhere exotic and enjoying his life. H. Tawney was left to pick up the pieces and herd cats to get an 11. As 22 boys gathered on another dry dust bowl, dropped in from Chennai, it was hard to tell who was a Barbar and who was a Blue. Of the 11 Barbarians on show, their team featured:
the one time winner of the Blues best newcomer award - H. Tawney;
the current Blues bowling champion Alex Keating;
Blues wicket taking machine: Jack Close;
Hal Stevenson - famed for his strike-rate & irregular appearances
Archie Tawney - Blues stalwart
Luke Dickinson, Rowan, Mirch and Olly Bromfield all who at some stage have played for Blues.
Only 2 of the 11 had not turned out for the beautiful golden ducks or received an honoured head-pat. In a match that could fairly be coined as Blues As vs Blues Bs the bookies were unsure as to which way the victory would go.

Toss won, Jenks chose to field first. Get fielding out the way, score very few runs, crack open a beer and watch everyone else bat - was the infallible logic.

Glenn, having already dismissed a blue for a golden duck on Friday was hungry for more young blood. With the new ball in his hand the skills on display were pure wizardry and too much for the Barbar's top order. Utilizing the inconsistent bounce of the pitch Glenn camped firmly in that 4th stump channel and probed away. Quickly a half chance came. The lad came forward to drive it and the ball popped up much higher than expected for it to sail towards Eddy J at mid-on. The spike-less Ed scrambled to get to the bounce, slipped and fell flat on his back. Cue Blues groaning all round. As Ed lay prostrate, eyes still firmly on the ball, he stuck out a deft left paw and the ball plopped perfectly into his palm. The first wicket of the day fell and it was their gun bat - 'used to play for Yorkshire' was the chat in the pub afterwards. No match for the wily old Glenn.

A few overs later and Glenn squared up their batsmen for it to take the outside edge and fly safe to gully to be gobbled up by the waiting Fyfe. Proper test match bowling, rarely do you see a batsmen 'squared up' in village cricket. Blues hollering and Glenn on a roll. New batsmen in and after an over of dot balls, a rare leg side ball was thrown down by Glenn. The batsmen threw the kitchen sink at it and missed but for the fairest of nicks. A touch of the glove, Youcef moving nimbly to his left and the leg side strangle was completed. The batsmen honourably falling on his sword, took the decision away from the Umpire and departed the field of battle. 29-3 inside 10 overs and the Blues were buzzing.

H. Tawney, having been dismissed by Glenn in his most recent Barbars fixtures, had hidden down at 5 hoping he wouldn't have to face Surbiton's king of swing. Alas the top order had capitulated and into the lion's den he was thrust. Staying true to his brand he swung widely and managed to inside edge it for 1 to get off strike.

James Howe bowling with good wheels from the other end was keen to get in on the action. HT hungry for runs stayed true to form and treated us all to a bit of Haz-ball. A few big blows from HT to get the scoreboard ticking until James worked out how to bowl to H. Tawney: fast and at the stumps. Plan executed perfectly, the big heave ho and miss, bails flying everywhere and the head of the snake was severed.

Keats thrust into the middle and Rory handed the ball, an interesting match up for the spectators. How much respect would there be between 2 seasoned fast bowlers? Well very little it seemed as in the first over Rozza C steamed in and hit Keats twice. A very prompt apology each time, as Rory deduced that on this wicket he would probably be required to bat. A few more dots and then Rozza C had his man, clean bowling him to win the battle of the gingers. Rory continued his work, challenging the batsmen and got unlucky, had a close LBW turned down and a simple catch that was put down. But still, had his wicket and had the fast bowling bragging rights.

In next was Hal Stevenson, who in the theme of the day, stayed true to his brand and tee'd off from ball 1 to ruin Glenn's stats. 3 for very little became 3 for 33 and luckily his 7 overs were up and Jimmy Leworthy was thrust into the attack. First ball, Hal lines him up and smashed it high and not very handsome. 3 fielders congregated on the waiting Fyfe. Like a fullback under the high ball, Hamish held his hands high and safely gathered the ball. 1st ball from JL and Hal was in the hutch.

As men were departing left right and centre, it was Archie Tawney who had demonstrated a calm beyond his years to look like the lone Barbar who would not hoik across the line and who would wait for bad ball. Scoring heavily in his trademark area, between point and first slip, Archie rotated the strike and radiated calm. Control the controllables and don't worry about anything else. Well as Archie had ground his way to double figures and was looking assured Olly Bromfield decided to absolutely barbecue him. A huge mix-up left both batsmen stranded at one end as the ball was tossed to the other for James Leworthy to take the bails off. Poor old Archie had to go. That looked like the game and as we took drinks at 18 overs it was 78-7.

Great fielding all round, the boys looking energetic throughout on what was a tough outfield. Usual magic from the Mullett, this time with a quick spot of fielding. Underarm throw on the run, direct hit. Given the situation the Barbars were in, not out was the Umpire's call. Ollie Hope, proving more useful than his older brother Jesse, was reprieved and to the delight of all Star Wars fans 'a new Hope' was born.

The Barbars also batted all the way down and Sam Mirchandani in particular looked incredibly fluent, playing classical shots, batting with the tail and getting his side to 3 figures. Hmm, we needed to open up an end. Fyfe into the attack to toss it above the eyeline. Settling into a rhythm Fyfe made things happen. A half volley was walloped between square leg and cow corner. Rory at square leg was deep in discussion with the umpiring HT and dutifully called 'Yours!' The Blues congregation in unison screamed 'run Jimmy' as a dozing Jame Howe was woken from his daydream on the boundary. Startled, he quickly got those long limbs moving, made up his ground and performed a demi-dive, demi-fall, landing on his back with the ball clutched between both hands. Ollie Hope had to go.

Again the tail was wagging and Sam Mirch and Jack Close got to 128 before Mullett worked his magic. With a beauty of a delivery 'what a seed' Closey was heard to exclaim, it moved out the hand, off the pitch and in the air, to clip the bails and end the innings. 128 all out.

Unsure if that was enough or too many, the Blues tucked into lunch. Skipper Jenks was slightly uneasy as his Blues debut had been on this fickle wicket, where the Blues defended 120 bowling out the oppo for 80. Aware of all possibilities, the batting order was quickly done on who looked like they could stay in and bat the overs.

A match defined by 2 brilliant opening bowling spells by Messers Moore and Close. Glenn taking 3 and Close going one better with a 4-for. An opening spell that removed Cef (LBW); Metson and Eddy J - both bowled when the ball stayed very low & Jenks senior, defended it with hard hands to a very close mid off. Luckily some runs had been scored and the Blues were on 40-4 after 11 overs. Game still in the balance, but it was becoming increasingly clear that the match was all about wickets.

Lawrie Blakey, a top recruit from RC, looked assured and comfortable on a pitch where every ball was a challenge. Lawrie anchored the innings whilst chaos unfolded around him. Surviving 7 overs of a Close cannonade plus some testing bowling from Keats. A Superb partnership blossomed from Charlie and Lawrie, blunting the Barbar's attack, taking the shine off of the new ball and taking the match deep. A partnership of 28 runs and the Blues were breathing easily. Lawrie got unlucky and looked to up the ante, smashing it to cow corner. Picking out the right fielder, Harry Tawney nervously waited under the ball. The entire common went silent, no Blue or Barbar dare utter a sound. In the silence one could hear a pin drop, but unfortunately the ball did not and a very relieved HT took the plaudits. Lawrie had to go for 19.

At this point it is worth pointing out that Wandsworth common had the feel of a village fete. Throngs of youngsters were pouring in. Kudos to multiple Blues for bringing fans and travelling support. Mullett and Charlie had brought an audience, one bloke turned up in full whites who Richard was bowling to on the boundary's edge. Lawrie again brought fans. Rory subjected the lovely Bina to a day (and night) with the Blues. Ellie even made a rare appearance. Nick Goodwin brought Harriet, a close second to Maddie this year for Blues Number 1 fan - and in addition brought an army of vaguely athletic looking friends all playing beach games. A future hunting ground for the Blues maybe? The fairer Czapalski, Grace, popped down with a few mates to cheer on Fyfe and Leworthy.

As we know it is the busiest day of the year for the local corner shop and this year did not disappoint with cans and bottles on a constant supply chain of boys traipsing to and from the corner of the field. Keeping the guests well oiled if not well entertained the Blues made sure conversation was flowing. Indeed so much so, that the Blues who had already batted, or in James Howe's case, were about to bat, had started tucking into the beers with relish and were barely following the cricket. So it was that Sam Robinson, hearing the Blues had a chance of victory stopped by to watch the fun. Sporting full Blues training gear, Sam initially came for a beer and a catch up but somehow found himself scoring while James rolled cigarettes and spoke to the fairer sex.

Back to the cricket. As we know, the fixture was finely poised. 68-5 after 18 overs.

Fyfey enters the fray. The Blues in-form bat, having a Jonny Bairstow esque summer coming in down the order to flay a weary attack. Joins the resolute Charlie, the pair rotate the strike and comfortably get the score ticking upwards. Adding another 22 runs, the boys got to 90-6 with Charlie having to depart after surviving 51 balls - the longest vigil of any of the 22 boys. Extreme kudos on that minefield of a pitch.

Rozza C, thrust into the limelight by his captain was gently persuaded by all watching Blues to have a bat. Normally comfortable scaring opposition batsmen, scoring and talking, the Blues illuminati decided he was due a bat. Helmet on, Rory strode to the middle bouncing up and down like an eager spaniel let off the lash. On entering the crease Collett Introduced himself to the bowler (one of the few non Blues) only for the bowler to angrily reply 'we've met about 5 times mate!'. A smirk to the umpire, textbook Alpha power play well executed by RC. The most entertaining aspect of Rory's batting is his ball by ball commentary back to the bowler and the other batsmen, which I believe neither appreciated, but made the fielders & umpire chuckle. A lusty blow of those powerful shoulders and the crowd were treated to a huge one bounce 4 back over the bowler's head. Great calling from Fyfey to keep a lid on the excitable Collett and the boys passed 3 figures. Now only 20 to win. After getting to double figures Rozza had to leave after a good ball by Hal.

Now into the death overs. 116-7 with 6 overs left. 13 more to win. 4 wickets to lose. More magic from Hal and 1 run later Fyfe had to go. Oh dear. Both ends were open. 2 new batsmen at the crease and the mantle was handed to the James combo. One having just got over his hangover, the other settling into his 5th pint not expecting to bat.

After 2 wickets in 2 overs from Hal and with Keats steaming in from the other end it was certainly a tall order for the bats and 3 quick wickets to take a last gasp Barbar victory was looked faintly possible. A well placed nick for 4 from Howe and the Blues only needed 9 to win.

Cue Harry Tawney with a rash captaincy decision. Pulling Hal out of the attack he thrust in Olly Bromfield for his first bowl of the game. James Leworthy finished last week's game with 3 4s from the last 3 balls and almost repeated that trick this week. A wide from the bowler and then 2 sumptuously stroked 4s sealed the matter. Good night New York and victory for the third year in a row for the Blues.

Tall tales followed and much merrimaking was had. With a sell out crowd congregating on the County Arms in rare abandon. As we took over the pub, Rozza C got everyone revved up, bolt offs were on the cards, night-time exploits were recounted by the younger members; Mullett was even spotted smoking cigars. Heady days. All were glad it was a Saturday game as the lack of water and food seemed to hit home at about midnight when it all descended.

Top marks to Bina for outlasting all of the Barbars and most of the Blues in the pub. What a fixture. Next year won't be the same, maybe Alex Pike will be back from hols and string an 11 together, maybe someone else will step up, who knows. But rest assured Keats' Latchmere Wanderers are primed to entertain on Saturday 20th August for some more SW London based Saturday cricket with inevitable debauchery for afters.

See you all soon

Jenks.

Highlights:
Glenn 3-33
Worldie catches from Eddy J and James Howe.
Jimmy Leworthy: 2-12 from 4 overs plus 11*
Fyfe: 1 wicket, 2 catches and a solid 25

[updated 17 11 2022]